The difference between elevator use and abuse is two letters and one floor
This is something the jack-asses on the sixth floor of my building would do well to keep in mind. Seriously, how effing hard is it to walk DOWN one flight of stairs? I’m pretty sure babies do it, and cats. And cats (and babies) have way smaller legs than all the asshole adult human non-walkers on the sixth floor.
When I get in that elevator, I am in a hurry to get to the ground floor on my way to the-hell-out-of-here, so it is most def. NOT appreciated when some clown stops me mid-ride to go down 10 feet. Seriously. WALK. It’s a grand thing, and we’ve been doing it for thousands of years. That’s why our infrapubic angles are so small and childbirth so difficult (bi-pedalism has its trade offs, whereas an anthropology minor is just useless).
I bet if you put an australopithecine on the sixth floor and told it to get to the fifth floor, it would take the goddamn stairs. And it had a brain about 1/3 the size of ours. It would also probably NOT read The Express and NOT take the orange line anywhere, because it, as what is essentially a giant upright ape, probably smelled better naturally than the perpetual burning-brake redolence of the effing metro.
When I get in that elevator, I am in a hurry to get to the ground floor on my way to the-hell-out-of-here, so it is most def. NOT appreciated when some clown stops me mid-ride to go down 10 feet. Seriously. WALK. It’s a grand thing, and we’ve been doing it for thousands of years. That’s why our infrapubic angles are so small and childbirth so difficult (bi-pedalism has its trade offs, whereas an anthropology minor is just useless).
I bet if you put an australopithecine on the sixth floor and told it to get to the fifth floor, it would take the goddamn stairs. And it had a brain about 1/3 the size of ours. It would also probably NOT read The Express and NOT take the orange line anywhere, because it, as what is essentially a giant upright ape, probably smelled better naturally than the perpetual burning-brake redolence of the effing metro.
Comments
Or not. Whatever.