Missing from my Life Pie: Deep Thoughts.



When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, mmmmmmmm, boy.
-Jack Handy




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36

Today is my own personal new year. Last weekend, my sister-in-law asked me if I feel old. I honestly don’t.   Since the age of five I have been an angry old man, so if anything I am one step closer to becoming my Most Authentic Self. But since I do now have the sagacity of 36 years on this earth, and since I am on the blog-twice-a-year plan, I offer the following 36 pieces of “wisdom” (sic). Some are certainly things I’ve learned, some I’ve just observed, and some are just statements I can say because it’s my birthday and my blog, damnit. Cheers and thanks for reading. *** 1. Real butter is worth it. If you have been denying yourself real butter because it’s fatty, bad for you, not as cool as ghee, etc. pull your head out of your ass and start eating it. A little goes a long way and there is no substitute. 2. All things in moderation. Especially moderation. 3. Anyone that denies themselves entire food groups by choice is a lunatic. We have one life...
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Economy Watch (Or, an Exercise in Parentheses)

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In light of recent news that our super great Government is now looking to give the super great US auto-industry $25 billion of the $700 billion bailout (imagine: 700 billion frosties ), I can’t help but wonder: WTF (What the f*ck)? I thought the money (my money, your money) was meant to stabilize the US financial system, not our crappy auto industry. I dig that a lot of people are employed making (bad) US vehicles and they’d “lose their jobs” (become unemployed), but come on. This is a clear case of “been there, done that” (in Latin: shouldus knowest betterest by nowest ) which resulted in little to no innovation on the bailoutees ’ part (read: shitty cars or big cars or ugly cars or the movie Transformers, basically a really long, really bad GM commercial that even Optimus Prime couldn ’t save). I owned a GM vehicle in college, and frankly, I’m thinking Nancy Pelosi should be lobbying the Bush administration to give me $25 billion as pay-back for my car breaking down all the god...
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The Back to School Book Review, Part 1

Jefferson: Architect of American Liberty  by John B. Boles It’s back to school time, and that means I have time and the mental headspace to actually read a book.* * Books, to me, are nonfiction. Fiction is lame, unless its Jane Austen, and even then, a good film adaptation can do the trick. Some of you may remember that my dear beloved Angus liked to review books. Since he is no longer with us, I have to carry on the torch without him, knowing I can never do as good a job as he would. I really learned a lot about Jefferson from this book. TJ never held the same cache for me as other Founders, even though we have much in common: We both lived in Williamsburg, we both didn’t really like William and Mary…ok, so that’s it. Anyway, here are some of the things I remarked on, in no particular order: This was a very sympathetic biography, and the author begins by saying that we cannot judge Jefferson by modern standards: “As much as we might wish, Jefferson was not a modern man.” Fine dude...
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