Top 10 off-color slogans to find on a baby onesie


The author would like to thank the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, as this post never would have happened without the poor judgment of its store. The author would also like to thank her likeminded friends, as this list is inspired by and borrows from the cleverness of their “WTF” reactions to the nonsense on your left.

This list is illustrative and not exhaustive. Any resemblance to onesies actually found on a baby, human or otherwise, is purely coincidental.

1. Blame the alcohol
2. Neither mommy nor daddy *really* wanted me
3. Change in birth control
4. Ploy to get daddy to marry mommy
5. Attempt to find one person to love mommy unconditionally (Note: this is why I want a pet. Is that bad?)
6. $3,500 tax credit
7. This onesie cost more than a condom would have
8. Can you tell the difference between me and my unplanned sibling?
9. The result of an especially potent sext
10. You’re never too young to be your parents’ sounding board

Comments

Jenna said…
I would like to add:

"Daddy's best swimmer"
August 31, 2009 at 8:53 AM
MB said…
Who am I kidding? *I'd* totally wear that on a T-shirt. I've always had a soft spot for apparel with slightly vulgar sayings.
August 31, 2009 at 9:04 PM
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