Change I can believe in.
Things are changing. I know this because we now have a president and first family in the White House that are just like you and me—young, cute and they get their clothes personally designed for them by JCrew. So here are some major changes I’d like to see in the first 100 days: First: Natural peanut butter will actually be spreadable after the first 2 uses. No longer do I want to pry the peanut-y goodness for the jar with a v. small pick ax. I want it to spread as smoothly as the other stuff all the way to the end of the jar. Next: Hooker red nail polish comes off with one cotton ball. 7 cotton balls and Q-tips are no longer required. Then: The comics in the newspapers will actually be funny, as will comedians. After that: JCrew final sale items will be returnable. Which brings me to: Winter will end after New Years. Full on spring will come by January 2, January 3 in a really bad year. Nextly: Office emailing will become illegal. All messages must be delivered in person, on the phone